“We’re Just Friends”: Fact or Fiction

So I have to ask the age old question: Can a guy and a girl be JUST friends? Is it possible for there to be a camaraderie without lust, or worse, love getting in the way?

We’ve all seen the romantic comedy films where two people meet, become friends, vow to themselves that they’re not interested in the other person, fall head over heels in love, get a broken heart and an awkward friendship, and then finally end up together with a smile and a kiss.

In A Lot Like Love, the main characters become friends, but write off each other as romantic partners. Over the period of 7 years they keep in touch, go through things together, fight, laugh, cry, etc. In the end they realize that they’re meant for each other. Does that really happen in real life? That’s just one example, we’ve all seen numerous films based around the premise of  a ‘just friends’ relationship…but they never do stay ‘just friends’ do they? Interesting.

According to an article on teen advice on about.com, guys and girls can be just friends, and the idea that it’s impossible is appalling:

“Objections to these types of friendships come from a crude cultural belief that all guys view girls as sexual objects first and real people second.”
The article goes on to say that yes, friends can experience a level of physical attraction to one another, but if that is the case, then the best thing to do is be honest about it. Get it out in the open, and then let it go. I think that’s more like having an elephant in the room. Say you lust for your best guy friend and he doesn’t for you, but you tell him anyways.  You’ve just opened a can of worms, and filled his head with erotic fantasies.  Awkward moments and a fragmented friendship ensue.
I’m of the opinion that people can fall for someone if they spend enough time with them. I think it’s a perfectly normal thing for a  girl to fall for her best guy friend or vice versa because that person is always around; they spend time with them, support them, laugh at/with them, etc. To be honest, what could be better than falling in love with your best friend?
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5 thoughts on ““We’re Just Friends”: Fact or Fiction

  1. I think it’s more common for a girl to be “just friends” and be able to leave it there but much harder for a guy. Since he is usually somewhat attracted to the girl to begin with. If he wasn’t, he probably wouldn’t have become friends with her. Testoserone in combination with “love of the chase” are what seem to drive men in seeing friendships as possible relationships. I could be wrong . . .

  2. True, a lot of guys have told me that they become friends with girls in the hopes of there being something more one day. On the other hand, I know plenty of friendships where the idea of ‘something more’ is disturbing and hilarious. Thanks for you opinion!

  3. From my schooling days I had so many good Girl friends.One or two of the are my best friends and we still speak to each other as if we were in those childhood days.

    When I was in my bachelors I was kind of cautious on speaking with girls.Not all of them would think positive if a guy starts speaking to them( They would have thought what are his motives eh?) Again that would depend on where they have come from.

    Its all in the mind,for me I know Ive got two best friends as girls and they think in the same way as well

    It would take ages before people in India would recognize that Girls and Boys and be good friends as well

    Vijay

  4. I have had plenty of guy friends in school and college. However, even if the guy just wanted to be a friend, his friends would spread rumors that the guy and gal were more than friends. That is usually the end of a beautiful friendship.

  5. I have had plenty of guy friends in school and college. However, even if the guy just wanted to be a friend, his friends would spread rumors that the guy and gal were more than friends. Being in India, that is usually the end of a beautiful friendship.

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